.

Lockdown has affected us all in different ways and for many it has been and continues to be a struggle. For starters if you are anything like me, you are sick and tired of hearing the word ‘Lockdown’. It goes without saying that for those who have suffered the loss of family or friends or indeed other stresses that have come through this, have my deep sympathy.

In many ways I have been really lucky. We moved home early March just before things became difficult and scary with all the conflicting information that was about. I have spent significant time working from home which some might view as a jolly and others could view as an opportunity. Sadly, I am going to hold my hand up and say it was neither.

At times, the remote working has kept me very busy. An absence of social contact has derailed me. Yes, pizzas and other junk food, also have played a part. I look on my Strava stats and March through to June were pretty awful with hardly any runs or walks. Looking back on my writing since I published the poem book and I hang my head in shame. I seemed to hit a block where everything I was putting down seemed awful to the point where nothing was used.

This blog post is a bit of an update on what has been happening at my end. It it isn’t all doom and gloom and stagnation, despite the words above. Firstly, I have been quite active contacting publishers and literary agents. That is a slow process and I initially made mistakes with vanity publishers. I am also finding it a slog with the agents. One I was in contact with this week said that before the dreaded lockdown they were receiving 150 manuscripts a week and now they are getting over 400. Everyone wants to be a writer.

Anyway, remember I said this wasn’t a post about stagnation. In July I started my comeback, well a little at least. I was writing the odd short story and began a virtual running / walking challenge of 874 miles. At this point there were some other ‘life challenges’ that got in the way, but they are there to be overcome. This week has seen further change as I am coming back into the office more and I feel like I have been in a dark room when suddenly the light has been flicked on. Just the drive for my commute has me thinking like I used to. I find myself coming up with ideas that had been out of my grasp months earlier.

My mental health took a knock because I wasn’t seeing anyone. Now I do understand that others have had time at home with their nearest and dearest and for some that hasn’t been a picnic either. That brings me around to the point of this post. Well, in my view at least. I know some of us are introverted and others are extroverts, so this isn’t precise, but as humans I think we need a happy medium between two points. Isolation or overwhelm are things that most do not want to experience. In the middle with the right people seems a good idea.

During Lockdown (Yes, I know we are sick of hearing the word, but I don’t want to treat it like Voldermort by saying L that must not be named), I was isolated, and I recognise now that I didn’t handle the situation very well. My creative side just gummed up.

Now I have only been in the office this week, so it is too early to tell but life does feel more harmonious. Just writing this blog post is a start to show that I am back and writing. More importantly I am prepared to put content up for others to see, even if it is a bit of a ramble. The virtual event I started mid-July is also up to nearly 300 miles, so all good progress.

Sometimes with topics like creativity through to more sensitive subjects like depression, things creep up on us. It is only when something significant changes that we realise, hopefully. My advice to you all is to keep an eye on your own life and those closest to you. Look for signs if things aren’t quite right so you can get yourself back on track if you need. It can be nice to ‘see the light’ and understand we can step out of a rut. Even better if we can do so without months or longer of slump.